This past year has been full of change. I got out of a 5 year relationship, my parents divorced, and I moved across the country. I’m happy to be where I’m at now but there is still a lot of pain and confusion and grief that I am working through. Building my confidence up after so much rejection and loss has been a challenge. The main thing I’ve realized in the past few months is that I can’t rely on others to validate me or make me feel good about myself. I have to decide that I am enough and that I am worthy of love. Nobody is going to make me believe in myself if I am not comfortable in my own skin.
My goal right now is to become a safe place for myself and spend more time enjoying my own company and with friends that truly care about me. I’m learning how to set boundaries and put myself first. I have spent a lot of time making other people comfortable at the expense of my own well-being, and it’s taking quite a toll on my mental health. It’s about time I protect my peace. I don’t have it all figured out and I don’t think I ever will. We’re on a spinning ball in space for God’s sake. I know I feel a lot and sometimes I let my emotions get the best of me, but at the same time, I am glad that I experience life fully and deeply. I embrace my pain and sadness because I think there are lessons to be learned from them.
I don’t know what life has in store for me the next couple years or even the next couple weeks. I think one of the biggest obstacles in life is the illusion of control, that leaves us feeling disappointed and drained when things don’t work out the way we planned them. Life never goes as planned, and that’s hard but at the same time that makes it kinda fun, it keeps you on your toes. To me, strength is the ability to be kind, compassionate, present, and positive in any circumstance, and learn from your problems instead of running away from them.
Right now, I’m in the process of taking my power back and it’s full of high highs and low lows (and lots of good music). As I’m getting ready to release my next EP, I am kind of terrified because of how much I believe in this music and how vulnerable these songs are. My heart and soul is in this record unlike anything I’ve released before. I’m challenging myself to stay focused on what I can control like working my ass off promoting it, telling my story, connecting with my fans and staying confident in myself and proud of my work no matter what the outcome is. The first single is called “Butterflies” and it comes out July 26th. Looking forward to what life has to offer me without any expectations. Divine love is within all of us, keep giving yourselves GRACE.
-Baker